I feel as if everything that I am doing is my last. Like all of my actions need to be properly measured, because I need to savor it all. I am currently sitting with my toes in the sun, because I really don’t like the idea of not soaking in some of the Barcelona sunshine while the sun is out. It’s not even supposed to be, according to weather.com, and I like to think that all my final days in Barcelona will be sunny (though I doubt I will be that lucky).
It is very weird to think that I will never be back here again. I mean, it’s quite possible that I might visit Barcelona again, but I’m not so sure. I may not return for 20 years. How can someone life, alone, in a place for 4 months and then leave? It’s a really silly idea, now that I’ve done it, and I wonder where anyone ever thought that study abroad was practical. Don’t get me wrong, I completely understand all the learning, etc, but when I think about it as I have just said it… really, it seems quite absurd.
I have oodles of free time, no urge (or real need) to study for final exams. I definitely find myself thinking about all sorts of things. The areas that I never explored, or the things that I did, the loning to go out and continually do something (basically be a tourist again) but feeling tired after my 10 days Spring break and my impending week of travel after the program. I am very glad that I am traveling afterwards. There needs to be a buffer between the Barcelona farewell (the people) and the return home. I’m going to be a bucket of nerves.
I didn’t experience a real culture shock when I came here. I wonder what I’m going to get when I go back. Surely the re-entry workshop that CIEE has planned for us will help immensely… *snort* What a crock.
